I have a confession to make. I got married…and I didn’t wear white. There it is! Two years ago, this younger (and less financially equipped lol) girl eloped with a very small intimate ceremony on a snowy morning in February…in a red dress. And I wouldn’t change it for the world! But let’s be honest, every girl wants a dream wedding so we’ve always planned that on our 10 year anniversary we would renew our vows and plan the wedding of my dreams. For all things wedding, starting out with Lover.ly is a must. It’s the one stop shop for brides with everything from wedding dresses, accessories, and even makeup! So when I got the chance to plan my dream day with Lover.ly, I was so excited to bring some of my visions to the blog.
If you’ve been following the blog for some time you may have come across my Love Yourself Completely post. I’ve posted it twice here and both times I was met with such love and encouragement from Queens (here and on my social media accounts) about the message. In that post I talk about loving yourself completely and embracing everything about you. Total self acceptance. “Flaws” and all. I also talked about the things I experienced in my past that I learned to embrace and accept about myself. That transparency with you all was major for me. I’ve never really spoke out on something so personal. Writing about beauty is easy. It comes naturally to me and it’s something I’m passionate about. But what’s not so easy is being transparent and I was really happy to see such positive feedback.
*VINTAGE BEAUTY post from This Brown Queen originally posted in April 2013*
Hello beauties! I wanted to take today to focus on something different than my usual ramblings. Today I wanted to talk about inner beauty and loving yourself. One of the most important things you can do Queens is to LOVE YOURSELF COMPLETELY. To me, this means not only accepting but embracing everything that makes you uniquely YOU! God makes no mistakes Queens. You look how you look, you are who you are for a very divine reason. While makeup is fun (clearly, you have witnessed my obsession!), it isn’t a means of transformation but rather a means of enhancement. To enhance your natural beautiful self. We are ALL beauty Queens in our own way!
This is one of my favorite quick pictures. Not because of the makeup (but do you see that gorgeous pink in my inner corner? Loveee) but rather the up close and personal features of ME. When I was younger I was teased for my forehead and my big eyes. Kids be so cruel man! But I mean…it IS true, and I LOVE it! I EMBRACE IT. What they may have called big, I call amazing. I make my eyes stand out every chance I get (not that they need it 😉 ). But this is me. Take it or leave it! What’s funny though…is when I started loving me, the “teasing” grew to compliments. What used to be viewed negatively, I flaunted and then it was cool. Life is funny like that. The point of my post Queens is this: Never alter yourself for the sake of others. Love Yourself first and others will follow. And if they don’t follow…you don’t really need to be associated with those people anyway 😉
Stay Blessed & Beautiful!
Hello my lovely queens. So I’m about two weeks post big chop and the feelings of “what in the world did I just do” are finally subsiding. At the end of the day loves…it’s just hair. Or is it?
Chopping all your damn hair off is a pretty monumental moment. I mean, hair, as I referred to it in my last post, is your crown and glory. And people regard it as such. Not just for us naturals but for everyone. We spend millions on hair products whether it’s shea butter, relaxer, or brazilian remi, we take great pride in our hair. So to cut it…all…it’s a bold move. I had a come to Jesus moment staring at my reflection and kinky hair. There is no hiding at that moment queens. This is you.
What were my thoughts? Oh I touched on everything from what hashtag I can use on my instagram pics to dreaming of going to Africa. I’m weird like that though…my mind tends to wander. But in all honesty it got deep. Somewhere between what would people say, and I how I could explain my decision…I got to thinking. What am I defending? The natural hair that grows out of my head? My thinking that kinky hair is MY beautiful? I didn’t have to put chemicals in my hair, or iron it bone straight to fit a standard of beauty that was not me.
It got deeper though. I started to realize how crazy this whole thing really was. When I really started to think about it, it was upsetting. Why did brown women chemically relax and straighten our hair? Why was straight hair something to be admired and kinky hair frowned upon? Why are we changing who we are in order to feel beautiful? I thought about so many phrases and things people have said over my life in regards to hair. What’s “good” hair, and how to make your hair “look nice”. According to what standard though was the question. I concluded that it honestly didn’t matter. The hair that I was given WAS good. The way my hair grew from its roots LOOKED NICE. Period.
This is a journey, as you’ve probably heard many of us making the return to natural say. It’s a process that doesn’t end after you cut those last relaxed ends off. Honestly for me…it was actually just the beginning. Embracing my natural hair.
Peace, Love, & Blessings
I’ve been blogging for about 6 months now and I think that it’s safe to say I’m pretty much obsessed with the beautifully chaotic world that is the blogosphere. Throughout these last few months my blog has grown and evolved so much and I thank all my readers and supporters for that! You all are very much appreciated <3. As I cross my 6 month mark I find myself reflecting on what This Brown Queen stands for and what I want to do here on the blog, my other social media outlets, and my life. Though, I’m all over the place (as I usually am) one thing is for certain…This Brown Queen is BEAUTIFUL. The blog, the mission, the goal. The connections I’ve made. The people I’ve come across. The communities of bloggers I participate in. The amazing brown queens I encounter all over the world (thanks to the internet). Simply beautiful.
I consider myself to be a self proclaimed beauty connoisseur and I wear that crown proudly. I LOVE beauty and all things pretty. But…I stress the importance that beauty TO ME, is more than a pretty face. It’s more than the make up that you wear, or the clothes you buy. Beauty is YOU. It’s within you. It’s outside of you. It’s around you. It’s the passion my queens have for their businesses. It’s the confidence I see from people stepping outside their comfort zones. It’s empowerment of women to women. It’s all of that. Wrapped up in a pretty brown bow. I think each person has a different belief in what beauty is to them and I want to inspire and support you to do whatever it is that you feel makes you beautiful. For THIS brown queen that’s a pretty lipstick and new shoes…(and a baby cloth over my shoulder because Jr is unpredictable and I don’t want no problems 😉 ). For YOU queen it could be anything. As long as you are KNOW that You are Beautiful.
Thanks for continuing along with me on this journey of my beautiful brown life. I will continue to bring you the best in beauty, fashion, motherhood and life. I hope that you continue to stick with me while I continue to chase dreams and write from the heart in red lipstick and pumps. And be sure to look out for my new venture, combining my passion for beauty and support of my queens!
Peace, Love, & Blessings
Today’s Spiritual Sunday is a scripture I read often. Throughout life there are people who are just out to do you no good. You may not know why, you may not understand. You don’t deserve it. It is unwarranted. But it is what is. Our basic instinct is always to react in the same fashion. You do me wrong, I’ma do you wrong. Trust me. I know these feelings ALL. TOO. WELL. But, hard as it may be. That’s not the way we should respond.
You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet your brethren only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the tax collectors do so? Therefore you shall be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect. ~Matthew 5:43-48
It’s hard. I know. This is a struggle I deal with constantly. I posted this for you AND me. Because Lord knows I need the strength!
It’s hard for me to take in this life thing sometime.
It’s like, I want to do everything.
All of it.
But there’s no time…or is there?
Sometimes I get suffocated by the beauty of life.
And all that you can do.
And other times I’m highly disappointed that I’m not THERE yet.
I’m thankful though.
Most of the time I over think life.
It’s a gift and a curse.
But I really just want to live…on my terms…and be happy.
Is that my dream?
Then there’s just not enough hours in the day.
Ya know, to make my dreams a reality.
I can barely make my family dinner after work.
Work. Whose idea was this?
You make time “they say”. Well…that sounds easy.
“Hold fast to dreams”…
It WILL happen one day.
I believe in faith.
In hope. In love. In life.
How could I not?
Have you seen my babies…they are miracles.
REAL. LIFE. MIRACLES.
Peace, Love, & Blessings