I’ve always admired those moms. You know the ones who look absolutely fabulous from head to toe, carrying a toddler in one arm, pushing a stroller with the other, and balancing a designer bag on her shoulder. The Queen glam mommy for me has to be Kimora Lee Simmons. She’s always so flawless and with her children in tow. Just slaying all day err day.
And my obsession continues. I really am just totally in love with Shea Moisture. Not just because my hair loves their raw shea butter deep treatment masque, or that my skin thrives off their Coconut & Hibiscus face and body bar, even though these are MAJOR…but I’m a sucker for branding and Shea Moisture has really done an amazing job hands down. So when they started releasing products that I could buy for the whole family, well you KNOW I was all for it!
My loves! So I’m taking a mini break from my usual beauty posts and writing about life today. Things have been pretty crazy these recent weeks between blogging, working on a writing project, working full time, assisting with my husband’s business, fulfilling my mommy and wife duties and more. WHEW! I’m tired just writing about it let alone living it! Which prompted me to write about something I’m sure my brown queens can relate to and that’s how to maximize the hours in a day. Now I know we’ve all seen the memes telling us that “We have the same 24 hours in your day as Beyonce” and I’m sure that I wasn’t alone giving my *side eye* like PUH-LEASE. I have no nanny, housekeeper, personal chef, driver, assistant and whatever else King Bey has so…no my 24 hours are a tad bit different ;). However, I’m sure there are things that can be done in order to squeeze a little bit more time out of my day. Here’s what I’ve been doing and I’m sharing with my queens! Hopefully some of you can relate and put these into practice!
“…from him much will be required; and to whom much has been committed, of him they will ask the more.” ~ Luke 12:48
I don’t really know why I chose this scripture for this post. It just kind of resonated with me. Like many Queens, THIS brown queen does it all. And no, I’m not boasting or bragging. Don’t you know that I would LOVE an assistant, a mother’s helper, a clone, ANYTHING to help me with my day to day tasks?! I’m sure we all do! But, I don’t have those things. It’s just me (and the Mr.) So I gotta do it all. There’s motherhood and marriage. Then there’s my 9 – 5 and entrepreneur aspirations. That alone is enough to fill 24 hours in a instant. Seriously. When 8 hours is supposed to be devoted to sleeping and 8 hours is spent bringing home the bacon, you’re only left with 8 hours to live! Really?? Whose idea was that? So in 8 hours I must raise my children, maintain my home, nurture my marriage, and grind to achieve my dream of being an entrepreneur.
So what happens? I’m sure ya’ll know the answer to this! Things get crazy. I mean real crazy. And 8 hours of sleep? What is that? Somebody let King Jr. know about this because clearly he doesn’t care. Like at all, about no 8 hours of sleep ;). Life becomes a constant flow of this and that. Days pass by faster than they feel. And nights feel nonexistent. It’s easy to get caught up in it all and feel overwhelmed. I know ALL about that. I can write a book about it. No literally I could.
Mostly, I try to maintain balance. Multitasking is my middle name, but I still leave certain things for certain times as it should be. This is key to my sanity. When it’s family time. It’s family time. When it’s time to work I’m in my zone. And I strive to do my best at my job just as I would in any other aspect of my life. Certainly most times you can find me iPhone in hand, baby on hip, two kids in tow. And I’d have it no other way. But BALANCE is key. When the time calls to put down the iPhone and eat dinner (which we do every night as a family!) than that is what must be done.
My point to this entire post which may seem like random ramblings is to say…I was blessed with my husband and my children. With my job and my talents. With my dreams and my goals. So if that means I have work a little harder in life than the next person so be it. I was given these blessings so it’s only right I’m expected to make the very most of this life!
Peace, Love, & Blessings.
This Brown Queen
……well….I’m really not sure how to start this post without indulging an extreme TMI. And let’s be honest, ya’ll might like me a little but I’m sure you guys don’t want to know every detail of my life…especially this. BUT, this IS This Brown Queen afterall, and that would be me so…
Where in the world is my postpartum period? Like…king jr is definitely 6 months old in 3 days. And yes, to mine and EVERYONE surrounding me surprise, I am STILL breastfeeding! WHOOOHOOO! If you’re a breastfeeding nut you’ll affectionately refer to this accomplishment as SILVER boobies. Yup that’s what we call them. So what. That’s what I’m going to have. And I’m soooo proud of myself for this! Although I don’t pump as much as I should at work, and king jr definitely has his fair share of formula, when Mommy is around it is all liquid gold aka breast milk :).
That being said…I guess my period just decided it’s just NOT going to come back. Which is fine! I’m not complaining. But I’m getting prettyyyy tired of lowkey freaking out every other day that I might get preggo again. Don’t get me wrong, I love babies as much as the next Queen but I’m pretty sure I’ve shut down this kingdom ;). So if it could just come back and just let me know that it is still around that’d be cool. Until then, I guess I’m doomed to have mini anxiety attacks at every wince, weird smell, and ill feeling -___-.
This Brown Queen
I’m talking about breastfeeding. And yes I am proud.
I’m not exactly what you’d call a breastfeeding extremist. I don’t bash formula (in fact I feed my son it often). I’m not screaming breast milk is the best milk. I won’t look down on queens who don’t breastfeed. But for my personal journey, I am QUITE excited about my accomplishment of being only a month shy of SILVER BOOBIES!! (My boobs aren’t actually silver but that’s code name in breastfeeding culture for 6 months of nursing). What I will tell you, are my thoughts, my personal experiences, and my decision to breastfeed my son.
I like to think I have unbiased view of breastfeeding. I have two sons, one I breastfed, one I didn’t. I can tell you what it’s like from both sides of the fence. Of course that makes me no expert, but that makes me experienced so here goes.
Shawn is my oldest prince. I didn’t breastfeed him. I was young, easily influenced, and I let mainstream society views sway my decision. I didn’t want to breastfeed. People thought it was weird. People thought it was sexual. My boobs would get saggy (Queens listen…they gonna sag…embrace it). I respectfully declined the invitation at the hospital. No thanks I’m fine. But then we got home and the problems started. He didn’t react well to regular formula. So we switched to Soy. And that made him constipated. We switched back and forth to no avail and so there was an actual period in time where my prince was so uncomfortable that I had to literally help him poop each morning while he screamed at the top of his lungs in pain. It lasted a month or so then all was fine. He caught colds, but he was fine. We bonded just great. And once my milk dried up, my boobs sagged a bit. Oh well. Embrace it. If I could do it all over again: I would breastfeed.
My youngest prince Joey was born. I breastfed him. I was older. I didn’t care. I’m breastfeeding this baby. Who cares what anyone thinks about it. My boobs…well…as long as my husband likes them. Where’s my baby, take this breast. But then we got home and the challenges started. For breastfeeding to be so natural it’s HARD. Those first few weeks are torture! All he did was want to eat. All day. All night. I was leaking everywhere. It was a nightmare. And I ALMOST quit. In fact. I did quit. I told my husband I was done. Thanks for his support. Bought some formula (the kind that Shawn did best with) and was done. Except, Joey didn’t quit. And giving him a bottle was even worse than breastfeeding 24/7. He looked at me like I was crazy and just wouldn’t accept it. He kept searching for his “real milk” and when he got frustrated he freaked. Like crying so hard he turned red. I gave up and let him nurse and the INSTANT comfort he had melted my heart. I couldn’t stop. So I kept at it. And next thing I know, it was second nature. And so here we are 5 months in and I’ll keep going until he wants to stop.
It’s not always easy but the best things in life usually aren’t. But it’s worth it. Going back to work, it’s been bittersweet. Pumping S.U.C.K.S. but our bonding time at home makes up for it. If you were to ask me in public I’d say: There’s no need to ask me if I’ll be breastfeeding my next kid because I’m DONE! But if you were to ask me for real, ya know, between queens I’d say: Well…if I were to try once more for that princess, YES MA’AM I’m breastfeeding!
This Brown Queen